Have you ever tried to “fake it till you make it”? If you have, you know how exhausting it can be. You’re constantly pretending, trying to convince yourself (and others) that you’re someone you don’t fully believe you are. It’s a cycle of self-doubt and frustration that rarely leads to real, lasting change.
Here’s what I’ve learned: faking it doesn’t work. What does work? A simple but powerful approach: decide, take action, and remind.
The Difference Between Convincing and Deciding
When you’re trying to convince yourself that you’re a certain type of person, you’re essentially arguing with your own mind. You’re saying, “I’m confident” or “I’m disciplined,” but deep down, there’s a part of you that doesn’t quite believe it. That internal conflict drains your energy and keeps you stuck in the same place.
Now, compare that to deciding. When you decide what type of person you are, you’re making a firm commitment. You’re saying, “This is who I am now.” It’s not up for debate. The moment you decide, you shift your focus from doubt to action.
Why Action Matters More Than Words
Decision alone isn’t enough. You’ve probably seen people who declare big goals or new identities but never follow through. That’s because transformation requires action.
If you’ve decided you’re the type of person who prioritizes fitness, for example, you don’t stop at saying it. You lace up your shoes and head to the gym. You choose nourishing foods. You make time for movement, even on busy days.
Action reinforces your decision. With every small step you take, you’re proving to yourself that you’re becoming the person you decided to be.
The Role of Reminders
Even when you’ve decided and taken action, you’ll have moments of doubt. Life gets messy, motivation wavers, and old habits try to creep back in. That’s where reminders come in.
When those moments happen, you remind yourself: “I am this type of person.” This isn’t about convincing—it’s about reinforcing. You already made the decision. You’ve already taken the actions. The reminder is simply a way to refocus and stay on track.
Think of it like a compass. When you’re unsure of the path, the reminder points you back in the right direction.
Why “Fake It Till You Make It” Falls Short
The problem with “fake it till you make it” is that it skips over the most important parts: deciding and acting. It’s like trying to build a house on a shaky foundation. Sure, you might fool a few people on the outside, but inside, you know the truth.
Without decision and action, “faking it” leaves you feeling like an imposter. That’s not the energy you want to carry into building your best life.
Instead, focus on becoming—not pretending. The process is slower but infinitely more rewarding.
Decide, Act, Remind: A Formula for Growth
This approach can apply to any area of your life:
Fitness: Decide you’re someone who moves their body daily, then show up for a workout. Remind yourself of your commitment when motivation fades.
Confidence: Decide you’re confident, then start speaking up in meetings or setting boundaries in your relationships. Remind yourself of your worth when doubts creep in.
Self-Care: Decide you’re someone who prioritizes self-care, then carve out time for rest and rejuvenation. Remind yourself it’s okay to put yourself first.
It’s not about perfection; it’s about persistence. Each decision, each action, and each reminder builds momentum. Over time, the person you decided to be becomes your default.
Your Next Step: Join The YLF Experience
If you’re ready to stop “faking it” and start truly becoming the best version of yourself, I invite you to join The YLF Experience. This isn’t just a program—it’s a space for you to decide who you want to be, take action toward your goals, and build a life that aligns with your values.
Through tools, resources, and a supportive community, you’ll have everything you need to cultivate self-acceptance, confidence, and lasting growth.
👉 Click here to join The YLF Experience
Stop pretending and start becoming. Let’s do this together. 💪🏻