Hey there. I’ve heard the phrase “everything happens for a reason” more times than I can count. And while I understand the comfort that idea can bring, I don’t fully believe it. Life does teach us lessons, but not everything that happens has some grand reason behind it. Many times, it simply comes down to a choice. A choice we made, or a choice someone else made, that set things in motion.
When I look back at the different moments in my life, I can see how some led to powerful lessons. Those are the moments that taught me resilience, patience, or self-acceptance. But I’ve also been through situations that had no deeper meaning. They were just the result of a choice, sometimes mine and sometimes not. Trying to attach a reason to those moments doesn’t help me. What helps is recognizing the reality of what happened, processing it, and then deciding how I’m going to move forward.
I think we put a lot of pressure on ourselves when we try to assign meaning to every event. It can make us feel like we failed if we don’t immediately see the “reason” behind something. The truth is, sometimes life just happens. People make decisions, accidents occur, and outcomes unfold. That doesn’t mean we can’t learn from those experiences. But it does mean we don’t have to waste energy trying to justify or explain every single one.
What I’ve learned through fitness and beyond is that my growth doesn’t come from the idea that everything was destined to happen. My growth comes from how I respond. If I made a choice that didn’t serve me, I can choose differently next time. If someone else’s choice impacted me in a way that hurt, I can choose how I’m going to carry that moving forward. That’s where my strength is built, through the inside/out approach.
This perspective has been freeing. It reminds me that I don’t have to figure out the “why” behind everything. I just need to focus on what I can control, which is the choice I make right now. That’s where the lessons of life truly come from, not from some invisible reason behind every situation, but from the way I decide to take the next step.
If you’ve spent years on your weight loss journey trying to make sense of every setback or misstep, I encourage you to give yourself a break. You don’t have to have a reason for everything. You just need to decide who you want to become and make the choices that move you closer to that version of yourself.
If you’re ready to keep building from the inside/out, I invite you to join one of The YLF Experience. Together we’ll work on mindset, fitness, and habits that support the life you’re choosing for yourself.