Hey there. For years you may have felt like certain foods have power over you. Foods that you “can’t keep in the house,” foods you’ve labeled as off-limits, foods that trigger guilt or anxiety just by being around. I know what that feels like because I’ve worked with countless clients who have been stuck in that exact cycle. And the good news is there’s a way out. There’s a path to diffusing those trigger foods so they lose the hold they’ve had on you for years, maybe even decades.
What I’m going to share here is a clear, step-by-step process that you can use to start working through your food triggers. You can move through it all at once, or you can go step by step at your own pace. Either way, you’ll be heading to the same place.
Step One: Take Away the Deadline for Weight Loss
This is where we start, and it might feel like the biggest mindset shift of all. Remove the deadline for weight loss.
Most of us have lived with deadlines attached to weight loss for as long as we can remember. Maybe you’ve had a vacation coming up and thought, “I need to drop 20 pounds before then.” Or maybe there was a wedding, a reunion, a doctor’s appointment, or even just the looming change of seasons that had you setting arbitrary timeframes for change.
Here’s what happens when you have those deadlines. You rush. You restrict. You set rules so tight that breaking them feels inevitable. And when you do “mess up,” you spiral. Taking away the deadline creates room. It gives you the time you need to make changes that actually stick.
This isn’t about taking your foot off the gas forever. It’s about giving yourself permission to approach your relationship with food differently, without the weight of a ticking clock.
Step Two: Add Water to Every Meal
Next, we’re going to build a couple of easy, low-pressure habits that will support you while you defuse those triggers.
Start by drinking water with every meal. That’s it. Breakfast, lunch, dinner, whatever meals you regularly have , add water alongside whatever else you’re drinking.
If you love coffee with breakfast or soda with lunch, keep having those. Just add water. If you have a smoothie, great, just drink water with it. The idea isn’t to overhaul what you drink overnight. It’s to create an easy habit that will serve as a foundation for the bigger work ahead.
Step Three: Add Produce to Every Meal
Alongside the water, add one serving of produce — fruit or vegetables to every meal.
This is about choice and enjoyment, not forcing yourself to choke down kale if you hate it. If you like strawberries and bananas, have those. If you like roasted carrots or grilled peppers, include them. You can rotate what you eat so it never feels stale.
Adding produce does two things. First, it naturally improves the quality of your meals without making you feel deprived. Second, and maybe even more importantly, it gives you small daily victories to point to.
When you’re working on something as emotionally charged as trigger foods, it’s powerful to have a few habits you can look at and say, “I’m doing this well.”
“I removed the deadline for weight loss. I’m drinking water with meals. I’m adding produce.”
That mindset shift matters.
Step Four: Face the Trigger Food, Every Day
Now we get to the part that might make you nervous.
You’re going to take your biggest trigger food — the one you’ve labeled “off-limits,” the one you don’t trust yourself around and you’re going to eat it. Every day.
Yes, really.
Here’s why this works. Right now, you have a cycle going. You’ve decided this food is off-limits. Maybe it’s bread. Maybe it’s ice cream. Maybe it’s chips. You keep it out of the house because you “can’t control yourself.”
But then, at some point, you “give in.” You eat it. And you don’t just eat a little, you go overboard. You eat way more than you planned, maybe until you feel sick. And then you tell yourself, “See, this is why I can’t eat this food.”
That thought starts the cycle again.
By eating that food every single day, you break the cycle. At first, it might feel weird, or even scary. You might feel guilt or anxiety. That’s okay. Keep going.
After a while, for some people it’s a couple of weeks, for others it might take longer , you’ll notice something shift. You’ll look at that trigger food and think, “I can have this every day, but I don’t really want it every day.”
That’s the breakthrough.
You’ll have proven to yourself that you can eat that food, that you can trust yourself, and that you don’t have to fear it.
Start with the Biggest One
Start with your biggest trigger food. Because once you’ve worked through the hardest one, the others are easier.
This isn’t about willpower. I know what that tug of war feels like. The exhausting back and forth of wanting the food and trying to resist it. This isn’t that. This is about systematically retraining your brain to see that food as just food.
And because you’re already drinking water, eating produce, and removing deadlines, you’ll have a foundation to fall back on when your thoughts and emotions feel heavy.
Respect the Emotions That Come Up
There’s no way around this: eating your trigger food every day will bring up feelings.
Guilt. Anxiousness. Maybe even frustration that you “shouldn’t need” to do this in the first place.
Respect those emotions. Don’t shove them down.
I’m a huge fan of journaling through this process. Write down what you feel as you work through eating that trigger food daily. Write about what the food means to you, the stories you’ve told yourself about it, the guilt you’ve carried.
This process is logical, yes. But food isn’t just logical. It’s emotional. You have to respect both parts if you want to come out the other side feeling free.
Here’s What Will Happen Over Time
At first, eating your trigger food every day will feel strange. But then, little by little, you’ll start to see the change.
You’ll wake up one day and realize you’re not controlled by that food anymore. You’ll still like it. You’ll still eat it. But you’ll feel empowered when you do.
The same thing will happen with your other eating habits. Because you’ve been drinking water with meals, you’ll naturally start reaching for water more often. Because you’ve been adding produce, you’ll start to see ways to include it in snacks too.
You’ll notice your overall eating pattern shifting, not because you followed a rigid plan, but because you built habits around your preferences.
And that’s the key.
Your Eating Plan Should Be Built Around Your Preferences
I’ve been saying this for years: the most sustainable eating plan is the one built around your preferences.
This process is how you start uncovering those preferences without guilt or fear.
By removing deadlines, you take off the pressure. By adding water and produce, you create easy wins. And by facing your trigger foods, you remove their power.
From there, everything else starts to fall into place.
Be Patient with Yourself
This won’t happen overnight.
Some trigger foods might take weeks to defuse. Others might take months. That’s okay.
Remember, you’re undoing years — maybe decades — of habits, stories, and fear around food. Give yourself the time to work through it.
You’re in control of this process. You set the pace.
And as you keep going, you’ll discover something powerful: the foods that once ruled you don’t anymore. You’ll eat them when you want to. You’ll leave them when you don’t.
And you’ll be building a foundation for eating that actually works for your life.