Hey there. When it comes to confidence, most of us have been taught that it comes only after we take action. The common advice is to just do the thing first and then your belief in yourself will follow. While action is incredibly important, I’ve found that this way of thinking is actually backwards. Confidence doesn’t come after the action. It starts with a choice.
Confidence is something you decide for yourself. You choose to believe that you belong. You choose to trust that even if you don’t have everything figured out right now, you will learn and adjust as you go. When you choose confidence first, the actions you take reinforce that belief instead of being the only proof that you are worthy.
The interesting thing is that we are already really good at reinforcing beliefs, but most of the time we use this skill against ourselves. Think about how often a negative thought pops up and you instantly find examples in your daily life to confirm it. That cycle keeps us stuck because we keep feeding into it. The good news is that you can flip the script. You can use that same tendency to reinforce positive beliefs. Choosing to trust yourself. Choosing to see proof that you can do hard things. Choosing to remind yourself that if you don’t know how to do something today, you can learn tomorrow.
Of course, those old thought patterns don’t just disappear. It would be great if they did, but they will show up from time to time. The key is to catch them and bring yourself back to the perspective you have chosen. I like to think of it as coming back to a calm and deliberate headspace about eighty five percent of the time. That doesn’t mean I never drift off into old patterns, but when I do, I make the conscious decision to return to the mindset I want.
Confidence is not about waiting until you hit a goal or see a certain number on the scale before you allow yourself to feel good about who you are. If you take that approach, you’ll always feel like you’re falling short. The reality is that you have always been enough as you are. Your body will evolve and change, but the foundation of confidence starts with choosing to believe in yourself today.
If you’ve been on a weight loss journey for years, you know how exhausting it can be to chase confidence through outcomes alone. The inside/out approach is about choosing confidence first, taking action from that belief, and reinforcing it as you go. That’s where lasting change happens, and that’s where your relationship with yourself truly shifts.
If you are ready to put this into practice and want guidance on how to build this into your daily life, I invite you to join The YLF Experience.