“Things fall into place when you take ownership of your life and focus on what’s within your control. Yes, there are plenty of things not within your control but they’ll work themselves out.”
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“The gym is my therapy.”
I’ve said it. You’ve probably said it too.
And to be clear, the gym does help. Moving your body, getting a workout in, having that outlet, it can absolutely shift how you feel mentally and emotionally.
That connection between your body and your mind is real.
But here’s where I think we need to take this a step further.
It’s not the gym or therapy.
It’s both.
For a long time, I thought confidence was something you earned.
You take enough action.
You build enough proof.
You stack enough wins.
And then eventually, you believe in yourself.
That sounds logical. It sounds like it should work.
But here’s the problem.
If you’re waiting for action to create belief, you’re always moving the goalpost.
There’s a phrase that gets said a lot when something tragic happens.
“I’m here if you need me. Just reach out.”
And on the surface, that sounds right. It sounds supportive. It sounds like what someone should say.
But for a lot of men, it’s not that simple.
You did everything you were supposed to do.
You showed up.
You put in the work.
You changed your habits.
You lost the weight.
And then you looked in the mirror… and still didn’t like what you saw.
Hey there. Forgiveness is one of the most misunderstood concepts in personal growth.
For many of us, especially those who have spent years trying to change our bodies, forgiveness feels dangerous. If I forgive myself, does that mean I am letting myself off the hook? If I forgive someone else, does that mean what they did was acceptable?
Hey there. Do not let the world harden you too much.
If you are in your mid 30s or beyond and you have been on a weight loss journey for years, chances are you have been through some things. You have opened up. You have tried again. You have trusted a plan. You have trusted people. Sometimes it worked. Sometimes it blew up in your face.
Hey there. There is a difference between being self sufficient and being isolated.
For a lot of people in their mid 30s and beyond, especially those who have been on a weight loss journey for years, independence feels like survival. You learned early on to rely on yourself. To not expect too much. To handle your own problems. To quietly fix your body, your habits, your life.
Hey there. There is a difference between hope and pretending.
If you have been on a weight loss journey for years, especially if you are now in your mid 30s or beyond, you have probably been told to just stay positive. Just think better thoughts. Just focus on the bright side. Just be grateful.
But sometimes things are hard. Your body does not respond the way you want. Your motivation dips. Life throws curveballs. You look in the mirror and still feel behind, even after all the work you have done.
Hey there. If you have been on a weight loss journey for years, you have likely felt the quiet pressure to fight aging.
Fight the wrinkles.
Fight the weight gain.
Fight the softness.
Fight the clock.
But what if aging is not the enemy?
Hey there. If you have been on a weight loss journey for years, especially if you are in your mid 30s or beyond, there is a good chance you have spent a large portion of your life trying to fix yourself.
Hey there. There is a quiet loop that so many people live in.
It sounds like this. I should have known better. I messed that up. If I had just started sooner. If I had just stayed consistent. If I had not quit.
Hey there. For years, maybe decades, you have been aware of your body.
Aware of how it looks.
Aware of how it compares.
Aware of how it measures up to whatever standard was put in front of you.
Hey there. There is a version of you that you do not want to see.
The petty version. The defensive version. The bitter version. The one that knows better but still reacts anyway. The one that justifies the behavior because it protects the ego.
Hey there. Fear is one of the most misunderstood emotions in your life.
You feel it when you step on the scale. You feel it when you start a new program. You feel it when you consider changing careers, setting a boundary, or speaking up for yourself. You feel it when you look in the mirror and wonder if you will ever truly be comfortable in your own skin.
Daryl
I want you to build a better relationship with yourself from the inside out. Check out my work on this blog, my podcasts and pretty much everywhere else online.