Learning From Others Can Save You Years

Hey there. There are a lot of ways we learn in life. Sometimes we learn by doing something once and realizing that was enough. Sometimes we repeat the same mistake over and over until we finally hit a breaking point. Experience is a powerful teacher. But there is another way we often overlook, learning by observing other people.

This is something I have been thinking about a lot lately, both in fitness and in life. Most of us have opportunities every single day to learn without having to be the one who bumps their head. We see patterns. We notice outcomes. We hear stories. But instead of slowing down and asking what we can take from it, we often rush past it or judge it or assume it does not apply to us.

The truth is we never have the full context of anyone else’s situation. We do not know their history, their stress, their health, their mindset, or what they are dealing with behind the scenes. But that does not mean we cannot learn something from what we observe. It just means we need to approach it with humility instead of ego.

This shows up clearly in fitness. Think about how many years you have been on a weight loss journey. Think about how many programs you have tried. Think about how many times you watched someone else go all in, burn out, quit, and then start again months later. The lesson is not that they were weak or unmotivated. The lesson might be that the approach was not sustainable.

You do not need to repeat every extreme plan yourself to learn that extremes do not last. You can observe it. You can notice the cycle. You can save yourself years of frustration by choosing a different path.

The same thing applies to how we treat ourselves. Many people I work with are incredibly hard on themselves. They speak to themselves in ways they would never speak to someone they care about. They believe pressure equals progress. They believe punishment equals discipline. Over time, that mindset leads to resentment, avoidance, and emotional burnout.

You can observe this pattern in others and learn from it. You can notice how shame based motivation rarely leads to long term consistency. You can choose compassion instead.

This does not mean avoiding honesty. It does not mean lowering standards. It means understanding that most people are doing the best they can with the tools they have at the moment. That includes you.

One of the biggest shifts I have made personally is leading with more kindness, both toward others and toward myself. Life is heavy. People are carrying more than they show. The person struggling at the gym might be dealing with something completely unrelated to fitness. The coworker who seems checked out might be overwhelmed. The version of you that keeps stalling might be exhausted, not lazy.

When we lead with compassion, we create space for change instead of resistance.

This ties directly into the inside/out approach I teach through Your Level Fitness. For years, many of us were taught that our worth lived in our body. In the number on the scale. In how we looked in the mirror. In how well we followed the rules. That belief system keeps people stuck in cycles of fixing instead of building.

Real change starts when you connect with yourself. When you respect your preferences. When you build habits that fit your life instead of forcing your life to fit a plan. This is true in fitness, in work, in relationships, and in personal growth.

You do not need to suffer to grow. You do not need to punish yourself to improve. You do not need to repeat every hard lesson firsthand.

Sometimes the smartest move is to slow down, observe, and choose differently.

If you have spent years trying to change your body because you were told you were not good enough, I want you to hear this clearly. You always were. You still are. The work now is not fixing yourself. It is learning how to support yourself.

That is exactly what I help people do inside The YLF Experience. If you are ready to stop repeating the same cycles and start building something sustainable, you can learn more and join here.
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