Body Image vs Body Neutrality

When I hear the term body neutrality, I understand the idea behind it, but I've always looked at it a little differently.

The idea that I should look in the mirror and simply feel neutral or indifferent about who and what I see isn't where I personally want to be. I think we should learn to become the biggest fans of ourselves, inside and out.

I realize that might sound a little woo-woo or hokey to some people. But how we perceive ourselves involves choices, and I think those choices are worth paying attention to.

That doesn't mean you're going to look in the mirror every day and love everything you see. There are going to be days when you don't.

If you look in the mirror and genuinely don't like something about your appearance, be honest about it. You don't have to pretend the thought isn't there. But once you've recognized it, you have another choice.

Can you find one thing about your physical appearance or the person underneath it that you do like?

I think that's important because of how easily our thoughts can cascade. You notice one thing you don't like. Then you find another. And another. Before long, you've built an entire negative perception of yourself from where that first thought started.

What if you took that same process in another direction?

Find one thing you like and build from there.

You're not going to be perfect at this. There will be days when you're really down on yourself. If that's genuinely where you are in that moment, own it. The important part is developing enough awareness to recognize what's happening and realizing that you don't necessarily have to continue taking your thoughts in the same direction.

This is also where I don't want my personal opinion about body neutrality to turn into me telling someone else how they're supposed to feel.

If someone tells me that being body neutral is the best place for them right now, I think that's wonderful. Having enough self-awareness and body awareness to recognize where you are is valuable.

I'd much rather someone recognize that neutrality works for them than feel pressured into pretending they love something they don't.

I'd probably ask them why they feel that way, but I'd ask the same question of someone who feels positively about what they see or someone who feels negatively about what they see. I'm always curious about why people perceive themselves the way they do.

So while body neutrality isn't where I personally want to land, that doesn't make it wrong for someone else.

Maybe neutrality is exactly where you need to be right now. Maybe eventually you'll want something different. That's your decision.

For me, the bigger question is whether we can become more conscious of the direction we're taking our thoughts.

Can you take the same cascading thought and build it in the other direction?

Instead of finding more reasons to tear yourself down, can you find one thing you appreciate and start there?

You don't have to fake it. You don't have to be perfect at it. You don't even have to feel the same way tomorrow.

Just become aware of where you are, how you're talking to yourself, and where you'd like to go from there.

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