Hey there. The way you talk to yourself matters way more than you probably realize. We often focus on things that drain our energy. Whether it's work, relationships, or life obligations. However, one of the biggest drains is something much closer to home: negative self-talk.

Yesterday, I was talking about the importance of stepping back, recharging, and resetting. And if there’s one thing that will keep you stuck in a cycle of exhaustion, frustration, and doubt, it’s a negative perception of yourself. It’s more than just the words you say in passing, it’s your core belief about yourself. If, deep down, you believe that you’re not worthy, not capable, or not "enough," then that thought process alone is draining you before you even get started.

How Negative Self-Talk Holds You Back

It’s easy to get caught up in the idea that if you just push yourself harder. That by being tough on yourself, you’ll eventually break through. But tearing yourself down as a way to motivate yourself is like trying to drive with a flat tire. Sure, you might move forward, but you won’t be getting anywhere as efficiently as you could.

Underneath everything you do, there needs to be a foundation of self-acceptance, self-appreciation and calmness. You should be at peace with yourself, appreciating where you've been, while knowing that none of the pain or struggle that got you here has to go with you moving forward.

This isn’t about pretending the past didn’t happen. It’s about acknowledging that it doesn't have to define your future. You are where you are right now, but you can go anywhere from here.

Building a Healthier Mindset with the Six Minimum Daily Actions

One of the best ways to shift the way you talk to yourself is by taking small, consistent actions that reinforce a healthier mindset. That’s where the six minimum daily actions come in. These are simple but powerful habits that can help you reconnect with yourself and reshape the way you see yourself:

1. Positive Self-Statements – Spend one minute in front of a mirror saying positive things to yourself. I call these "buildup sessions" because they counteract all the times you've looked in the mirror and torn yourself down.

2. Sitting Outside, Disconnected – Five minutes, no screens, no distractions. Just you and your thoughts. This allows you to slow down and check in with yourself.

3. Journaling – Spend five minutes writing down your thoughts. If you’re not sure what to write, start with: "What am I feeling right now?" and follow up with, "Why do I think I feel this way?"

4. Creative Pursuits – Express yourself in some way. It doesn’t have to be traditionally "creative"—maybe it’s playing a card game, sketching, or even organizing something. The goal is to tap into that curiosity and playfulness that gets lost in adulthood.

5. Addition Nutrition – Add a serving of produce or an extra glass of water to at least one meal. Small, sustainable nutrition habits build up over time.

6. Exercise – Get in at least 30 minutes of activity. It doesn’t have to be intense—it just has to be consistent.

Therapy as a Foundational Tool

I also believe that therapy is one of the most valuable tools for shifting the way you see yourself. A therapist can help you work through the blind spots in your thinking, giving you a perspective that’s difficult to find on your own. If you’ve been struggling with negative self-talk, therapy can be a game-changer. with the right therapist.

And if you’re starting to work with a therapist, these six daily actions give you something tangible to bring into your early sessions things you can track, reflect on, and build upon.

The Internet and the Self-Connection Crisis

We live in a world that constantly tells us that happiness is something external, something we have to chase. The internet and social media amplify this by constantly showing us what we "should" have or how we "should" be living.

But the truth is, you already have everything you need inside you. You just need to connect with it. The work isn’t about becoming someone else, it’s about uncovering and embracing who you already are.

If you’re ready to start doing the work to build that connection with yourself, I invite you to join The YLF Experience. This is where we focus on the inside-out approach to health, fitness, and self-development.